Note: This was originally written and posted on wethenerdy.com
The top-ten season continues, this week with movies. 2017 has been an interesting year for film, mostly in that I frontloaded the amount of movies I saw and didn’t like most of them. The ones I did like, I feel like didn’t like enough? Or that’s the impression I’ve been given. The Internet has a strange way of skewing perspective with discourse, hype, and general trolling, and I don’t think I moderated that enough this year.
The negative feedback cycle that was 2017 is perhaps its own conversation though.
As to this conversation, I’ve decided to frame it as a top-five affair instead of a top-ten. The reason for that is simple: The bottom half of my top-ten is boring. It’s all the big Marvel and action movies that we’ve all spent hours talking about already. More intelligent people than myself have explained why Wonder Woman is loads of fun and worthy of all the praise it received, and no one is going to miss another paragraph praising Star Wars: The Last Jedi, though I’m still tempted to write one.
And if I’m being really honest, my top-five makes me feel a bit more intelligent. I’m an insecure man at heart. I love vapid action movies and stupid fantasy novels and bad things with the best of them, but I feel guilty about it, like I shouldn’t.
It’s stupid, but hang-ups are hang-ups. I can admit I have them, which is probably a step in the right direction. Perhaps I’ll worry about the alcoholism next year when I feel the need to be introspective again.
So with all this nonsense out of the way, here are my top-five movies of 2017!
5: John Wick Chapter 2
Okay, so I know this is funny coming off that insecure paragraph, but damnit, John Wick: Chapter 2 is more than just a shooty-shooty, bang-bang action flick. Yeah a lot of people get shot and die, but the characterization and storytelling on display while that happens is really impressive.
We learn more about John Wick when he’s killing than when he’s talking.
He’s such a compelling character in these subtle ways that involve gunshots, stabs, and crashing cars. It’s a wonderful dichotomy that then gets continued on to the other assassins that live in this huge world. Talking leads to lies; fighting leads to truth. It’s a storytelling device I wish more action movies would use, because it absolutely fits the genre.
Pair that with some of the best action sequences I’ve seen all year and an amazing amount of world building, and you have one of the best action movies in a long time—certainly one of the best of 2017.
The IT film had a lot to live up to, because the novel is one of my favorites. It’s Stephen King at his best character writing, and it’s Stephen King at his best horror. IT lives up to the novel in all the ways it needs to while sacrificing little (what it does sacrifice I’ll forgive. The book is like 1200 pages long).
The Losers Club depicted on screen is perfect. Perfect. The casting, the acting, and the rapport is straight out of the book, with plenty of heart, horror, and humor. I cannot believe how well and believable everyone is. Meanwhile, Pennywise is perfect too. Bill Skarsgård nailed the otherworldly aspect to him, where he’s just a little funny and a lot dangerous. I knew how this would ultimately end, yet Pennywise always unnerved and surprised me.
I will admit to being more giddy than scared throughout the whole thing though, but given how much the book plays on old, schlocky horror, I honestly call that a plus. The movie is fun in the way a good horror movie should be.
3: Underworld: Blood Wars
Okay, so this really comes off as funny given that insecure paragraph above, but damnit…okay Underworld: Blood Wars is kind of a bad movie. I reviewed it for the site and gave it a 7, but that was being very generous. There are a ton of flaws with this one, especially a twenty minutes segment in the middle which is just dumb even by Underworld standards.
Here’s the thing though: I don’t care.
Underworld holds a very special place in my heart. It reminds me of being in high school in one of the few ways that doesn’t make me cringe in pain or embarrassment. It reminds me of staying up late and drinking 40oz Mountain Dews and playing World of Warcraft. It reminds me of hanging out with my best friend when the biggest worry I had was the homework I didn’t feel like doing. It reminds me o
f being a kid and enjoying bombastic bloodshed via B-movie monsters.
It reminds me of fun.
To the movie’s credit, it is fun. Selene is back and as badass as ever, and the last half hour gives one of the better action scenes in the entire series. It’s big and cool and if you don’t think about it, pretty awesome.
I also think it has some of the best sound design of 2017. Say what you will about the writing, but the audio technicians earned their pay this go around. The cuts sound gnarly, the gunshots sound massive, and the explosions are ground-shaking.
The day I don’t get excited about an Underworld movie is the day I’ve become a boring adult. I avoided that this year, and that’s why this is in my top five.
2: Get Out
Get Out is one of those movies that has thousands of pages of text already written about its importance, relevance, and exceptional storytelling, so me adding to that isn’t really doing much. I do want to say that it’s the most tense movie I’ve seen since The Green Room, walking the line between suspense, horror, and humor with expert footsteps.
It’s absolutely engrossing is what it is.
The rest of my praise is everything you’ve heard before: It’s smart, it’s important, the premise is exceptional, the twists are out of left field yet believable, the cinematography is great, the acting is great, etc, etc, etc.
Go see this one.
mother! is the most jaw-dropping, fucked up experience I’ve ever had at a movie theater. I went in knowing nothing save who was directing it, and I came out feeling like I had been through something akin to an alien abduction. I was affected but in a way that was hard to explain.
Primal dread and exhilaration don’t really mix, you know?
Everything about mother! is unnerving, from the first shot to the last. The way the camera follows Mother around in this close, claustrophobic way means you only get her perspective but in a way that’s too close for comfort. She’s the only person that acts like a real person in the entire movie, yet there’s still something off about her too. You can tell she’s otherworldly because she’s not insane.
You want to pull back to breathe, and you can’t. The movie won’t let you.
I could spend pages talking about the point to mother!, but there are so many ways to read the movie that I’d more than likely be wrong. I saw the relationship between author and creation first and a damning accusation of humanity and religion second, but what do I know? Both might be wrong!
That we can have that conversation is why I like this movie, though.
mother! is a wild ride, the kind of rollercoaster that only ever goes down. It’s clever and smart and wonderfully scary in ways that most horror movies never think to be. It is the best film I watched this year, and my favorite too.